Related:

• Sell your mountain-side chalet. You never used it much anyway.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Discover that you *can* eat seaweed. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Don't settle for anything less than a Seiko Sports 100.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Come to terms with the fact that mermen seem to be few and far between.
  (Well, how many have *you* seen?) -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Talk to fish. Sooner or later, they will talk back.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Act like a cartoon character. Most of your companions will be.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Drink like a fish. Try to get legless. -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid.
• Try to appreciate sex with your knees tied together.
  (This may be slightly more challenging if you are female....
• Experiment with new ways to visit the toilet. Whatever you're doing now, it's not going to work.
  -- Forty-two things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....