Related:

• Please call IBM. I believe my computer's on fire.
• The beer-cooled computer does not harm the ozone layer.
  -- John M. Ford, a.k.a. Dr. Mike [If I can read my notes from the Ask Dr....
• MOM, CAN I SET FIRE TO MY BED MATTRESS? No, Calvin.
  CAN I RIDE MY TRICYCLE ON THE ROOF? No, Calvin....
• I will not conduct my own fire drills.
• My computer can beat up your computer. -- Karl Lehenbaue
• How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
  -- Woody Alle...
• I BOOTED my computer. Broke my toe!
• I'm So Skeptical, I Can Hardly Believe It.
• I used to be normal, then I got my computer...