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• I can live for two months on a good compliment. Mark Twai
• A lie can travel halfway round the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
  -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)...
• Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.
  -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)...
• I do not like work even when someone else does it. -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)
• I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
  -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)...
• I am different from Washington; I have a higher, grander standard of principle.
  Washington could not lie. I can lie, but I won't. -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)...
• Let us endeavour to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
  -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens), from Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar(1894)...
• Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today. -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)
• Honesty is the best policy--when there is money in it. -- Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910)