Related:

• How many pessimists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, the old one is probably screwed in too tight....
• How many pessimists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. Why bother? It's just going to burn out anyway....
• How many New Historicists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None-historical forces will do it. The bulb-screwer is a relatively modern invention....
• How many feminists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. It's not the light bulb that needs changing....
• How many thought police -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. There never was any light bulb....
• How many survivors of a nuclear war -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs....
• How many feminists -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. Women have a supreme court, constitionally protected right to work in the dark if they choose to....
• How many frat guys -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None. Frat boys screw in puddles of vomit....
• How many Republicans -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  None, they only screw the poo...