Related:

• Murphy's Fourth Law for Husbands: Your wife's stored possessions will always be on top of your stored possessions.
• Murphy's First Law for Husbands: If you run into an old girlfriend -- no matter how innocently -- your wife will know about it before you get home.
• Gifts for Men -- Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• Gifts for Men -- Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• Murphy's Second Law for Husbands: The first time you go out after your wife's birthday, you will see the gift you gave her marked down fifty percent.
  Corollary: If she's with you, she'll assume you chose it because it was cheap....
• Men are amused by almost any idiot thing -- that is why professional ice hockey is so popular -- so buying gifts for them is easy.
  But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe they already have all the clothes they will ever need, and new ones make them nervous....
• You know you're in a small town when... You don't use turn signals because everybody knows where you're going.
  You're born on June 13 and your family receives gifts from the local merchants because you're the first baby of the year....
• Never try to guess your wife's size. Just buy her anything marked `petite' and hold on to the receipt.