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• And WHAT were those mistakes my parents made?
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  I don't require prescription drugs." "I am extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don't let them know of my immediate availability....
• An Act Done Against My Will, Is Not My Act!
• Letter to the Bank Manager Dear Bank Manager, I am writing to thank you for bouncing the check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.
  By my calculations some three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check, and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it....
• RODNEY DANGERFIELD'S BEST ONE-LINERS A girl phoned me the other day and said .
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• Dad's Words of Wisdom Don't ask me, ask your mother.
  Were you raised in a barn? Close the door. You didn't beat me....
• But Sir, my mother made me bring my umbrella !!!
• Grounds for Something... A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?
  She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by....
• The Divorce... A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?
  She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by....