Related:

• Roses are red and violets are too expensive
• I tried phone sex once, but the holes were too small.
• An 80-year old man read in the paper that someone had saved a life by signing an organ donor card.
  The man felt this was a noble thing to do so he called the organ donor organization to see if he could get a card....
• MY RESUME... My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned .
  .. couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax....
• Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
• Entry in young woman's diary : Monday: Went out with John tonight.
  We were in his car and he tried to get too friendly....
• Remember: Only ONE joke per submission. Extra jokes may be rejected.
  From werner Wed Jul 13 14:06:34 1988 Flags: 000000000000 From...
• Bill Watterson, cartoonist: "Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.