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If it works, it must be obsolete.
If it's BLUE and doesn't work, it's the Air Force!
If only AT&T knew what I was do&%$m6% NO CARRIER ....
If nothing can go wrong, something will !
If not for us, you might have done something constructive.
If nobody measures up, check your yardstick.
If only women came with pull-down menus and on-line help
If our behavior is strict, we do not need fun!
If she won't live forever, why give her a diamond?
If sex is a pain in the butt, you're doing it wrong.
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