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  A guy went to his financial adviser at the bank and ask if he were worried....
• The Real Reason Behind "The Mid Life Crisis" "Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me.
  She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night....
• An American mathematician returns home from a conference in Moscow on real and complex analysis.
  The immigration officer at the airport glances at his landing card and say...
• Today in the Stock Market: Helium was up, feathers were down.
  Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading....
• Ways to Commit Suicide After the Stock Market Crash 16> Sit under Hong Kong Finance Minister's window.
  Wait. 15> Rub together the two pennies you still have left to create a spark to ignite the alcohol vapors emanating from you....
• Twas The Night Before IPO... 'Twas the day before the IPO, when all through the net, Not an executive was flying, not even Ellison's jet.
  The documents were filed with the SEC with care, In hopes that the IPO soon would be there....
• Life is like .......... an analogy.
• Financial Report: 3 new bonds are being issued: * Lewinsky bond
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• Life is like Jazz, it should be improvised.