Related:

• While fishing at Toho I was baiting my hook when two six foot tall mosquitos alighted in front of me.
  I was so horrified, I was unable to move. One of them said, "should we eat him here or take him back home with us?...
• When will we ever learn?
• Parent Definitions... AMNESIA: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have kids again.
  DEFENSE: what you'd better have around the yard if you're going to let the children play outside....
• Mr. Reagan says he can't understand why interest rates are so high.
  Well, an old editor of ours always said that when we couldn't understand something we should look for the part money plays in it....
• Airplane Humor Here are some actual humorous statements by several airline flights crews.
  Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" a bit more entertaining....
• 10. Hot Buttered Elves 9. Santa's Magic Lap 8. Babes in Boyland 7.
  Crisco Kringle 6. Yes, Yes, Oh God Yes, Virginia 5....
• When we think, life thinks.
• When news breaks... We fix it.
• How can you tell when your lawyer is lying? His lips move.