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• I'm telling you, they are EVERYWHERE!
• I saw that! And I'm telling your mother!
• You know you're a redneck if ... ... The primary color of your car is bondo.
  ... In your wedding picture you have a toothpick in your mouth....
• >>>>> Im telling you, they are EVERYWHERE! <<<<&l
• The doctor told his patient "I have bad news and worse news for you, what do you want to hear first?
  The patient replied, "What's the bad news?" The doctor said, "Your tests have come back and we've determined that you only have two days to live....
• I am not arguing with you; I am telling you.
• A Woman's Random Thoughts Skinny people piss me off!
  Especially when they say things like, "You know, sometimes I forget to eat....
• A guy was telling his buddy that his wife could always tell when he had been messing around just by looking at his eyes.
  His buddy said, "No wonder, you have a pubic hair hanging from your eyelid!...
• Two English yuppies notice that an Irishman of all creatures has decided to visit their local pub.
  They decide to convince themselves that this guy is indeed as stupid as their prejudices would have it, and that in a - shall we say - rather intimidating fashion....