Related:

• How long do you suppose it will be before the Miss America pageant asks Bob Guccione to be a judge?
• I wonder if BOB GUCCIONE has these problems..?
• The current best bet for a woman veep is Rep. Geraldine Ferraro of Queens.
  Luckily for her she's not from Kings....
• How can Geraldine Ferraro help balance the ticket? Why, we bet Fritz Mondale outweighs her by 80 pounds.
• Geraldine Ferraro's husband no doubt now is preparing for the inevitable questions about his favorite recipes.
• You'd think the least "Penthouse" magazine could do is donate profits from its September issue to the Miss America scholarship fund.
• One reason Geraldine Ferraro got in trouble is hat on a disclosure form she apparently checked the wrong box.
  Which reminds us: Wasn't there once an Olympic fighter disqualified because he boxed the wrong Czech?...
• Subject: something to show for it Last night David Lettermen mentioned that Gennifer Flowers is going to do a "spread" in the December Penthouse magazine.
  He remarked that it will be good, for once, to see something that a Presidential candidate has done....
• Another way to slash the federal deficit would be to fix the{_ calendar so the year has two April 15s in it.
  Rep. Geraldine Ferraro says she'll allow herself to be nominated as a Democratic vice presidential candidate....