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• Bangkok Dry Cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results.
• Humorous Helpful Hints: ** Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
  ** Use a meat baster to "squeeze" your pancake batter onto the hot griddle and you'll get perfectly shaped pancakes every time....
• A man was very shy, and couldn't speak to more than two people at a time without getting nervous.
  His boss and wife both suggested that he take an Andrew Carnegie course....
• IN WAKE OF JONES DISMISSAL, A NEW FOCUS FOR STARR WASHINGTON
  April 1 (Associated Press)--In the wake of the dismissal of the Paula Jones sexual-harassment lawsuit, Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr is focusing his investigation on allegations that President Clinton and members of the White House staff regularly drink red wine with fish, according to sources close to the investigation....
• A dry sense of humor is better than slobbering everywhere
• Classic Quotes "I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was, You'll never find anyone like me again.
  I'm thinking, I should hope not. If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you?...
• Excerpts from a Cat's diary DAY 659 -- My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
  They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• Congratulations on your purchase of a CAT Unit! This model contains the following feature
  * User Friendly * Mouse Driven * Self Cleaning * Energy Saving Standby Mode When Not In Use * Self Portable Operation * Dual Video and Audio Input * Audio Output * Auto Search Routines for Input Data * Auto Search for Output Bin * Instant Transition (2 nanoseconds) Between Standby and Full Power Mode Production Detail...