I'd Go Through Anything For You. Let's Start With Your Bank Account.

Related:

• Great Female Comebacks Man: Haven't we met before? Woma
  Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic. Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?...
• Great female comebacks to bad pickup lines: Man: "Haven't we met before?
  Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic....
• A Wish For The New Millennium May your hair, your teeth, your face-lift, your abs and your stocks not fall
  and May your blood pressure, your triglycerides, your cholesterol, your white blood count and your mortgage interest not rise....
• Letter to the Bank Manager Dear Bank Manager, I am writing to thank you for bouncing the check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.
  By my calculations some three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check, and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it....
• HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY ** At lunchtime, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.
  See if they slow down. ** Page yourself over the intercom....
• LIFE BEFORE COMPUTERS: ** An application was for employment ** A program was a TV show ** A cursor used profanity ** A keyboard was a piano!
  ** Memory was something that you lost with age ** A CD was a bank account!...
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• While looking for a Real Job (read: technical writing), I've been paying the bills doing medical transcription work.
  I came across a book today called "The Empty Laugh Book" by the American Association for Medical Transcription, containing some of the funniest dictated and transcribed quotes from the world of medicine that I've ever encountered....
• Here are some lessons leaned from the experiences of a number of would-be bank robbers.
  Pick The Right Bank: You don't want to make the same mistake as the fellow in Anaheim, CA, who tried to hold up a bank that was no longer in business and had no money....