Related:

• Two Cows. . . FEUDALISM You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
  PURE SOCIALISM You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows....
• There is a married couple with two children. To avoid corrupting the children's minds, the couple uses the word "laundry" to represent sex.
  One night, the man rolls over to the wife and says "Honey, would you like to do laundry tonight?...
• Peter Marshall's List of Favorite Answers From "Hollywood Squares".
  .. -According to Movie Life Magazine, Ann Margaret would like to start having babies, soon, but her husband wants her to wait awhile....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• One Liners If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer....
• A tribe of Native Americans generally referred to their woman by the animal hide with which they made their blanket.
  Thus, one woman might be known as Squaw of Buffalo Hide, while another might be known as Squaw of Deer Hide....
• Once upon a time there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a famous movie actor.
  Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do pushups and somersaults and limber himself up all the time, while the other sperm just lay around on their fat asses not doing a thing....
• Many ALMOST Useful Facts: ** Debra Winger was the voice of E.
  T. ** Pearls melt in vinegar ** It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs....
• The Wizard of Zone Once upon a time in Depression-era Kansas there was a little black boy named Zachary X (pronounced "ex" not "ten") who lived on a farm.
  He was an orphan, a cheap device to garner your sympathy....