NEVER WORRY ABOUT MONEY AGAIN!
WIN A FREE VACATION!
This really works and is almost legal!
Hello, my name is Dave Rhodes. Two years ago I was broke, my car was
reposessed, you've heard my story hundreds of times.... Then I
instigated a chain letter to become rich off of stupid people! I lost
my last 10 bucks to it, but within only weeks two uniformed chauffeurs
showed up to whisk me away on my dream vacation: an all-expenses paid
trip to a huge 500 room resort including food, aerobics programs,
library and laundry benefits!! Now I don't worry about money at all
because even tips are covered! Membership has its priviledges.
At first I thought that the handcuffs required by the chauffeurs were
pretty kinky, but when they started telling me about the rules, I
became too excited about my chances of winning the dream vacation to
object. The qualification procedures were grueling, but well worth
the effort. I spent several days meeting with an application
committee of my peers and introducing my aquaintances to them before I
was awarded the grand prize. I became famous - an instant celebrity.
After another kinky trip with security appropriate to my fame, I was
provided with free leisure attire, introduced to the resort doormen
who keep out the riff-raff, and directed to a single room prepared
especially for me. I met some of the other guests, who assigned me my
own "handle": Dipstick Dave. The rooms are private, so I have a lot
of personal time ("solitary," they call it; I love the colorful
terminology). I've been using my free time to send Wish-You-Were-Here
chain-postcards to all my relatives, but I think most of them are too
jealous to visit or write. Except my mother-in-law; she visited once,
didn't say anything, but seemed awfully happy to see me here.
Guess what? There are two openings at the end my row. Occasionally,
the current guest in Suite A (Suite A gets the best food) leaves and
we're all shifted up the row. Well, that leaves an opening, for which
YOU MIGHT QUALIFY!!! No purchase necessary. Void where prohibitted.
Certain restrictions apply. Employees and relatives are eligible. You
must be at least 18 years of age and as DUMB AS A POST. All you have
to do is add your name to a chain letter and sucker in a few other
posts. It's really easy. You'll lose money on the chain letter, of
course, but think of it as an application fee. Send me a copy and I'll
pass it along to the doormen. You may already have won!! You can't
win if you don't enter the game. That's what I used to think. Send
away today! No-risk! Guaranteed! This is an equal-opportunity scam.
Winners list available. While quantities last. Allow 4-6 weeks.
Having a wonderful time. Wish you were here. Dave the Dipstick.
WIN A FREE VACATION!
This really works and is almost legal!
Hello, my name is Dave Rhodes. Two years ago I was broke, my car was
reposessed, you've heard my story hundreds of times.... Then I
instigated a chain letter to become rich off of stupid people! I lost
my last 10 bucks to it, but within only weeks two uniformed chauffeurs
showed up to whisk me away on my dream vacation: an all-expenses paid
trip to a huge 500 room resort including food, aerobics programs,
library and laundry benefits!! Now I don't worry about money at all
because even tips are covered! Membership has its priviledges.
At first I thought that the handcuffs required by the chauffeurs were
pretty kinky, but when they started telling me about the rules, I
became too excited about my chances of winning the dream vacation to
object. The qualification procedures were grueling, but well worth
the effort. I spent several days meeting with an application
committee of my peers and introducing my aquaintances to them before I
was awarded the grand prize. I became famous - an instant celebrity.
After another kinky trip with security appropriate to my fame, I was
provided with free leisure attire, introduced to the resort doormen
who keep out the riff-raff, and directed to a single room prepared
especially for me. I met some of the other guests, who assigned me my
own "handle": Dipstick Dave. The rooms are private, so I have a lot
of personal time ("solitary," they call it; I love the colorful
terminology). I've been using my free time to send Wish-You-Were-Here
chain-postcards to all my relatives, but I think most of them are too
jealous to visit or write. Except my mother-in-law; she visited once,
didn't say anything, but seemed awfully happy to see me here.
Guess what? There are two openings at the end my row. Occasionally,
the current guest in Suite A (Suite A gets the best food) leaves and
we're all shifted up the row. Well, that leaves an opening, for which
YOU MIGHT QUALIFY!!! No purchase necessary. Void where prohibitted.
Certain restrictions apply. Employees and relatives are eligible. You
must be at least 18 years of age and as DUMB AS A POST. All you have
to do is add your name to a chain letter and sucker in a few other
posts. It's really easy. You'll lose money on the chain letter, of
course, but think of it as an application fee. Send me a copy and I'll
pass it along to the doormen. You may already have won!! You can't
win if you don't enter the game. That's what I used to think. Send
away today! No-risk! Guaranteed! This is an equal-opportunity scam.
Winners list available. While quantities last. Allow 4-6 weeks.
Having a wonderful time. Wish you were here. Dave the Dipstick.
Related:
- W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<<<
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while... - Federal Aviation Administration,
Washington, D.C.
Gentlemen:
I was asked to make a written statement concerning... - Federal Aviation Agency,
Washington 25, D.C.
Gentlemen:
I was asked to make a written statement concerning... - My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole
package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's... - Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to watmath!looking!funny .
Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I... - A black guy and a gorilla go into a bar together. He says to the
bartender,
"I'd like a beer, and a gin and tonic for my girlfriend... - What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)...
Chain Saw:
( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can... - The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah... - A tribe of Native Americans generally referred to their woman by the
animal hide with which they made their blanket.
Thus, one woman might be known as Squaw of Buffalo...
From the same category:
- A good friend of mine, living in northern Michigan,
decided to go ice fishing. He gathered up all of... - From the Detroit News, June 8, 1988
Dateline: Santa Ana,
California. A man was fined $58 after failing to... - What is green and doesn't scratch on glass???
The same baby two weeks later... - ahhhhhhhhh...hhhhhhhhhhhhh (heavy breathing sounds,
like an obcene phone call) Oh, shit, you called me... - WE were in Geology Class (About 300 people) and on Final Exam the
teacher called for the Exam Papers.
Well 5 minutes later, sure enuff, a Student Came Down...
