Heard that Hollywood is making a movie about the dangers of casual sex?
Its called "Germs of Endearment"
An American, an Englishman and a Japanese fellow were discussing
their respective countries over drink at a London pub one evening.
The English fellow mentioned how that British medicine had progressed
so far that doctors recently had taken a single liver and cut it into
six pieces then transplanted it into six separate men in need of a healthy
liver. This had resulted in six new workers in the job market.
At this, the Japanese guy said that in his country doctors had cut a
lung into twelve pieces, transplanted these into twelve people in need
of healthy lungs, thereby putting twelve new people in the job market.
Not to be outdone, the American said "That's nothing. In the U.S., we
took one asshole, made it President, and now there are 10 million people
in the market for a job!"
Three men sitting around a campfire telling stories. The conversation
turns to medical miracles:
First man: There's a guy who lives up the street from me who used to
work in construction. One day last year his hand got run over by a
bulldozer. Whatever those doctors did, it's really amazing - today
he's a concert pianist.
Second man: That's nothing. I knew a guy in college - laziest bum I
ever knew. He was really fat and out of shape. He was trying to
hitch a ride one day and got hit by a truck. Broke nearly every damn
bone in his body. Somehow they put him back together better than he
was before. Now he's a triathlete and he's planning to try out for
Third man: Yeah, well I knew this poor retarded kid. He couldn't do a
whole lot, but someone at the dynamite factory got charitable and gave
him a job as a stockboy. Anyways, he's working in the warehouse one
day and gets locked in. It's dark and he can't find the door. Not
being too bright, he lit a match to try and find his way. The whole
place exploded. All they could find of him was his asshole and his
eyebrows. From that little bit they were able to put him back
together and that kid became governor of Massachusetts.
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...