The Happily Addicted to the Web Song (sing to the tune of Winter
Wonderland)
Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
I'm happy--although
My boss let me go--
Happily addicted to the Web.
All night long, I sit clicking,
Unaware time is ticking,
There's beard on my cheek,
Same clothes for a week,
Happily addicted to the Web.
Friends come by; they shake me,
Saying, "Yo, man!
Don't you know that life keeps moving on?"
With a listless shrug, I mutter, "No, man;
I just discovered letterman-dot-com!"
I don't phone, don't send faxes,
Don't go out, don't pay taxes,
Who cares if someday
They drag me away?
I'm happily addicted to the Web!
Wonderland)
Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
I'm happy--although
My boss let me go--
Happily addicted to the Web.
All night long, I sit clicking,
Unaware time is ticking,
There's beard on my cheek,
Same clothes for a week,
Happily addicted to the Web.
Friends come by; they shake me,
Saying, "Yo, man!
Don't you know that life keeps moving on?"
With a listless shrug, I mutter, "No, man;
I just discovered letterman-dot-com!"
I don't phone, don't send faxes,
Don't go out, don't pay taxes,
Who cares if someday
They drag me away?
I'm happily addicted to the Web!
Related:
- Jerk!
Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone
call I had to make.
I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely... - ENTER DATA, ENAMORATA
Back into the fray.
Thanks to all who sent along best wishes at the outset of my
vacation.
Now, as you rejoin the ranks and the column moves out... - HIS AND HIRSUTISM
Hair.
Heads up, my fellow male Marchers.
Get ready to temporarily ride the new permanent wave... - Knock knock
Who's there?
Don Juan
Don Juan who?
I Don Juan to set the world on fire... - Various Nights Before Christmas...
A Microsoft Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas,
when all through the house Not a creature was stirring... - Here are some of my favorite jokes from the HBO special Jackie Mason
On Broadway.
Keep in mind that Jackie is a former rabbi. His father... - She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time?
He: Do you have the energy? What is your favorite... - PAR FOR THE MAIN COURSE
I’m doing a dangerous thing.
I’m spending tonight outdoors alone. Ah...a fire...
From the same category:
- Socio-math problems for San Francisco students:
1).
Zelda and Jane were given a rottweiler at their commitment... - A Fairytale For The Assertive Woman Of The 2000's
Once upon a time,
in a land far away, A beautiful, independent, self... - Santa's Bad Day...
One particular Christmas season a long time ago,
Santa was getting ready for his annual trip, but there... - My Darling Wife...
A guy was invited to an old friends' home for dinner.
His buddy preceded every request to his wife by endearing... - You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man
of your background," sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand.
"If I wasn't under oath, I'd return the compliment...
