Only In America
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't
cross the street to vote in a national election.
We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we
have to make the down payment on a car that will take 5 years to pay off.
We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won't buy a car if it
can't go over 100 miles an hour.
We know the line-up of every baseball team in the American and National
Leagues but mumble through half the words in the "Star Spangled Banner".
We'll spend half a day looking for vitamin pills to make us live longer,
then drive 90 miles an hour on slick pavement to make up for lost time.
We tie up our dog while letting our sixteen year old son run wild.
We whip an enemy in battle, then give them the shirt off our backs.
We will work hard on a farm so we can move into town where we can make more
money so we can move back to the farm.
We get upset we're spending over a billion dollars for education, but spend
three billion dollars a year for cigarettes.
In the office we talk about baseball, shopping or fishing, but when we are
out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk about business.
We're supposed to be the most civilized nation on earth, but we still can't
deliver payrolls without an armored car.
We have more experts on marriage than any other country in the world and
still have more divorces.
We're the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the
world and more diets to keep us from eating it.
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't
cross the street to vote in a national election.
We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we
have to make the down payment on a car that will take 5 years to pay off.
We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won't buy a car if it
can't go over 100 miles an hour.
We know the line-up of every baseball team in the American and National
Leagues but mumble through half the words in the "Star Spangled Banner".
We'll spend half a day looking for vitamin pills to make us live longer,
then drive 90 miles an hour on slick pavement to make up for lost time.
We tie up our dog while letting our sixteen year old son run wild.
We whip an enemy in battle, then give them the shirt off our backs.
We will work hard on a farm so we can move into town where we can make more
money so we can move back to the farm.
We get upset we're spending over a billion dollars for education, but spend
three billion dollars a year for cigarettes.
In the office we talk about baseball, shopping or fishing, but when we are
out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk about business.
We're supposed to be the most civilized nation on earth, but we still can't
deliver payrolls without an armored car.
We have more experts on marriage than any other country in the world and
still have more divorces.
We're the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the
world and more diets to keep us from eating it.
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