Actual Doctors' Notes On Patient's Charts: ** Patient Has Chest Pain If She Lies On Her Left Side For Over A Year ** On The 2nd Day The Knee Was Better And On The 3rd Day It Disappeared Completely.

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Actual Doctors' Notes On Patient's Charts:
** Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year
** On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared
** She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was
very hot in bed last night.
** The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993.
** The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
** Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
** Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but
** The patient refused an autopsy.
** The patient has no past history of suicides.
** Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
** Patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with
only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
** Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
** Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
** Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you might like
to work her up.
** She is numb from her toes down.
** While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
** The skin was moist and dry.
** Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
** Patient was alert and unresponsive.
** Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid.
** She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she
got a divorce.
** I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical
** Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
** Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
** The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
** The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a
stockbroker instead.
** Skin: Somewhat pale but present.
** The pelvic examination will be done later on the floor.
** Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on
the abdomen and I agree.
** Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
** Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities