Related:

• Pizza Pranks 1. Press random numbers while giving order (touch-tone phone), and ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
  2. Tell the order taker that you have a rival pizza place on the other line, and you're going with the lowest bidder....
• Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry.
• Say "Are you sure this is (Pizza Place)? When they say yes, say "Well, so is this!
  You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact, (Pizza Place), start to cry and ask, "Do you know what it's like to be lied to?...
• Undocumented Assembler Commands: AII Scatter Deck BAH Branch And Hang BBBF Branch on Bit Bucket Full BCF Branch on Chip box Full BOHP Bribe Operator for Higher Priority BSST BackSpace and Stretch Tape CUN Cancel all User Numbers EMW Emulate Maytag Washer ERD Eject Removable Disk EXOI EXecute Operator Immediately IA Illogical And KCE Kill Consultant on Error MST Mount Scotch Tape MVLR MoVe and Lose Record PDM Play Drum Memory (dated
  wot?) PLSC Perform Light Show on Console PS Print and Smear RPB Read Print and Blush RCSD Read Card and Scramble Deck RFSC Read Feed and Shred Card RIG Read Inter-record Gap RSD Read and Shuffle Deck RWRT Read While Ripping Tape SD Scatter Deck SPD SPin dry Disk SSD Seek and Scar Disk UER Update and Erase Record =*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*= Intercourse Beats Masturbation Inefficient But Marketable Imperialism By Marketing Idiots Become Managers Insolence Breeds Mediocrity Incredibly Brilliant Marketing Incredibly Big Monopoly I Became Macintosh APPLE...
• SIGNS: ** On a Plumbers truck : "We repair what your husband fixed.
  ** On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania...
• Greetings prospective White House interns! This year, our program is heading into its 69th year of bringing America's best and brightest to the Nation's Capitol to help the "Head Man" do his job.
  We expect that 1998 will be the most exciting one yet!...
• Calling in Sick.... A Cat Owner's Story Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable because no matter how legitimate my illness, I always sense my boss thinks I am lying.
  On one occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway because the truth was too humiliating to reveal....
• The mind is the place great adventures start.
• 10. My Years with the White Sox 9. Pizza to Go - from Alpha Centauri 8.
  Leif Erikson: Lousy in the Sack 7. I Go Completely Nuts and Start Writing Books 6....