Hoover: Now, here's an oral extra-credit question. What was Christopher
Columbus actually looking for when he discovered America?
Lisa: [puts her hand up] Ooh! Ooh!
Hoover: Anyone besides Lisa for a change?
Ralph: [puts his hand up] Ooh! Ah!
Hoover: [nonplussed] Ralph, this better not be about your cat.
Ralph: [puts his hand down] Oh.
Hoover: Oh, all right, Lis --
Alison: Columbus was looking for a passage to India.
Hoover: Correct, Alison! And on your very first day in our class.
Alison: And, during a subsequent voyage, Columbus found what is now the
continent of South America.
Hoover: Yowie...
Lisa: I never made Miss Hoover "yowie"...
-- The grade two appraisal system, "Lisa's Rival"
Columbus actually looking for when he discovered America?
Lisa: [puts her hand up] Ooh! Ooh!
Hoover: Anyone besides Lisa for a change?
Ralph: [puts his hand up] Ooh! Ah!
Hoover: [nonplussed] Ralph, this better not be about your cat.
Ralph: [puts his hand down] Oh.
Hoover: Oh, all right, Lis --
Alison: Columbus was looking for a passage to India.
Hoover: Correct, Alison! And on your very first day in our class.
Alison: And, during a subsequent voyage, Columbus found what is now the
continent of South America.
Hoover: Yowie...
Lisa: I never made Miss Hoover "yowie"...
-- The grade two appraisal system, "Lisa's Rival"
Related:
- Lisa: Aah! It's the beating of that hideous heart!
[everyone looks at her] I mean, I think I... - Lisa: Ohhh, my family just doesn't understand my new found
vegetarianism.
Compared to them the public schools are a haven ... - Skinner: Ooh, now we're into the dregs. Here's Ralph Wiggum's entry.
[pulls sheet off] Pre-packaged "Star Wars"... - Hoover: OK, our next entry is "The Tell-Tale Heart" by Alison Taylor.
Skinner: Mmm, I can't wait to see this. [low voice]... - Ralph: Can you open my milk, mommy?
Hoover: I'm not mommy,
Ralph. I'm Miss Hoover. -- "Lisa the... - Skinner: Ah, "Diorama-Rama", my favorite school event next to "Hearing-
Test Thursday". [he and Miss Hoover walk... - Miss Hoover: [shakily] Children, I won't be staying long.
I just came from the doctor, and I have lyme disease... - Miss Hoover: You see, class, my lyme disease turned out to be
[spells it on the board] psychosomatic.
Ralph: Does that mean you're crazy? Student 2... - Ralph: ... and when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more,
that was the happiest day of my life. Mrs. Hoover...
From the same category:
- It's beautiful. It's the most awe-inspiring sight I have ever seen.
Giver of life, mother of us all...hey guys, look what... - Goodman: Whoa, would you look at this place?
Agent 2:
[speaking into a tape recorder] Sink full of dirty... - Samantha, I've always been suspicious of transfer students.
Other principals try to unload problem cases that way... - Selma: Now, Mr. McClure, would you like to take off those glasses,
and read the top line? [points to an eye chart]... - Skinner: All right, Mr. Smartenheimer, that does it.
First, you're going to give back everything...
