Boy, Time Really Flies When You're Reading... [sees What He's Holding] The Bible!

Related:

• He's the boy you love to hate! -- Homer on Bart, "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie
• Homer: You know, when I was a boy, I really wanted a catcher's mitt, but my dad wouldn't get it for me.
  So I held my breath until I passed out and banged my head on the coffee table....
• TV sucks. -- Bart, "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie
• Young man, since you broke Grampa's teeth, he gets to break yours.
  -- Homer's punishment for Bart, "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie...
• Homer: One adult and four children. Woman: Would you like to buy some Itchy and Scratchy Money?
  Homer: What's that? Woman: Well it's money that's made just for the park....
• Time really flies when you don't know what you're doing.
• Bart: What a perfect plan. Now, Roger Myers will tell as just.
  .. Myers: [announcing the studio's re-opening] And so when no one could think of a plan to resurect Itchy & Scratchy, a young boy, a wonderful irrepressible young boy, took it on his own to solve the problem....
• Doug: In episode 2F09, when Itchy plays Scratchy's skeleton like a xylophone, he strikes the same rib twice in succession, yet he produces two clearly different tones.
  I mean, what are we to believe, that this is some sort of a [the three nerds chuckle] magic xylophone or something?...
• Homer: Bart, didn't I ask you to watch Maggie? Ba
  Sounds like something you'd say... -- "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie...