Related:

• Well, you sure don't look 25, but your unlaminated, out-of-state driver's license is proof enough for me.
  -- Dispatcher at a courier service to Bart, "Bart on the Road...
• Lisa: Okay, but you gotta promise you won't get mad or tell anyone, especially Bart.
  Homer: I promise. Lisa: [Jenna von Oy-esque] Bart rented a car with a phony driver's license and drove Milhouse, Martin, and Nelson to a week out in Knoxville and their car got crushed and they're out of money and they can't get home and Bart's working as a courier and just came back from Hong Kong!...
• Tutor: Fifteen minute recess, Milhouse. The recess assignment is chapter three through seven.
  Milhouse: Yay! Recess! [tears outside] Ba...
• Plumber: Looks like you got a leak. Marge: Could you start fixing it pretty soon?
  The basement is getting awfully flooded....
• Bart: Well, now that we've blown your cover, I guess you gotta come back and do your show again!
  Lisa: Or kill us... [they both nervously giggle] -- Way to go Lise, "Bart the Fink...
• Moe: Sorry, Grampa, but I gotta stash ya in the bathroom so Betty won't get wise to us.
  [sets Grampa up between two urinals, and plugs him in] Grampa...
• And when with envy Time, transported, Shall think to rob us of our joys, You 'll in your girls again be courted, And I 'll go wooing in my boys.
  -- Thomas Percy (1728-1811) -- Winifreda (1720)...
• Wiggum: License please? [Troy hands his license] Says here you need corrective lenses.
  Put those glasses on, Mister. Troy: You wouldn't ask a handsome man like me to wear glasses?...
• Marge: Bart, Lisa, it's 11:00 at night. Where do you think you're going?
  Bart: Downtown. Lisa: We gotta get seats for the Itchy & Scratchy parade....