Lisa: The whole world wants me to eat meat. I can't fight it anymore.
[She musters her resolve and bites into a hot dog. Yells.]
There! Is everybody happy now?
Apu: I take it from your yelling that you like my tofu dogs?
Lisa: Tofu?
Apu: Oh yes. No meat whatsoever. And only thrice the fat of a normal
hot dog. I made the switch and nobody noticed.
Lisa: But why, Apu?
Apu: Of course I am a vegetarian. Haven't you ever seen my tee-shirt?
[Holds up a tee-shirt that depicts a cow with slash over it and
the words "Don't Have A Cow, Man!"]
Lisa: Heh heh heh, that's cute.
Apu: Here. Let me show you something Lisa. [Walks to a cooler marked
'Non-Alcoholic Beer" and opens the door. A set of stairs leading
upward is behind it.]
Lisa: Wow, a secret staircase. But what do you do if someone wants a
non-alcoholic beer?
Apu: You know, it's never come up.
-- Beer-swilling Springfield tube-jockeys,
"Lisa the Vegetarian"
[She musters her resolve and bites into a hot dog. Yells.]
There! Is everybody happy now?
Apu: I take it from your yelling that you like my tofu dogs?
Lisa: Tofu?
Apu: Oh yes. No meat whatsoever. And only thrice the fat of a normal
hot dog. I made the switch and nobody noticed.
Lisa: But why, Apu?
Apu: Of course I am a vegetarian. Haven't you ever seen my tee-shirt?
[Holds up a tee-shirt that depicts a cow with slash over it and
the words "Don't Have A Cow, Man!"]
Lisa: Heh heh heh, that's cute.
Apu: Here. Let me show you something Lisa. [Walks to a cooler marked
'Non-Alcoholic Beer" and opens the door. A set of stairs leading
upward is behind it.]
Lisa: Wow, a secret staircase. But what do you do if someone wants a
non-alcoholic beer?
Apu: You know, it's never come up.
-- Beer-swilling Springfield tube-jockeys,
"Lisa the Vegetarian"
Related:
- Paul: Linda and I both feel strongly about animal rights.
In fact, if you play "Maybe I'm Amazed" backwards... - Lisa: I guess I have been pretty hard on a lot of people.
Especially my dad. Thank you guys. Paul: Lisa... - Paul: What? She's leaving home?
Lisa: Wow! Paul McCartney!
I read about you in history class. So where's... - Apu: [grabs a tofu dog off the grill] Quick, quick,
no time to cook them -- they will plump in my... - Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Apu: Oh, it's hopeless. Oh, poor Apu.
Abe: Hey! The government can't control the sky.
What if you lived in a balloon? Lisa: That's... - Lisa: Hi, Apu. Can I put these posters up in your window?
Apu: Well, of course you can, you little pixy. You... - Lisa: Uhh, excuse me? Isn't there anything here that doesn't have meat
in it?
Doris: Possibly the meat loaf. Lisa: Well, I believe... - Apu: You see, whether igloo hut, or lean-to, or a geodesic dome,
There's no structure I have been to, which I'd rather...
From the same category:
- Jimbo: Psst. Hey, Simpson: check this out.
[lifts hat to reveal football concealed underneath]
Nelson:
Look what I got! [pulls back jean vest to... - Marge: What? Oh my God!
[Homer turns off the light]
[we can still see Marge's eyes in the dark -
as in any cartoon] Homer: Marge, could you close your... - Homer: {OK, we've got the secret vigilante handshake.
Now we need code names. I'll be Cue-Ball, Skinner... - Lisa: It's not our fault our generation has short attention spans,
Dad. We watch an appalling amount of TV. Homer... - Skinner: Oh, I hope I didn't miss the floor show.
Bart:
Nope. Skinner: Is Roxanne back? Bart: Yep. Skinner...
