Ned: Oh, Warren, I Know Your Dad Is In Prison, But Don't You Fret!

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Ned: Oh, Warren, I know your dad is in prison, but don't you fret! A
special celebrity dad has been arranged for you.
Warren: But -- my older brother would like --
Ned: [cheerfully] Sorry, but I'm afraid Ernest Borgnine has already
been confirmed.
[Ernest Borgnine walks in laughing]
Ernest: Hiya! I'm sure you kids know me best as Sergeant Fatso Judson
in "From Here to Eternity".
[The kids except for Bart and Warren cheer]
-- Or not, "Boy Scoutz 'N the Hood"