Related:

• Homer: And by the sacred parchment, I swear that if I reveal the secrets of the Stonecutte
  may my stomach become bloated and my head be plucked of all but three hairs -- Moe...
• Homer: You were right, Lisa: I've never felt so spiritually fulfilled.
  And with my brothers the Stonecutters behind me, this is the beginning of a better world for all of us....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: Uh...I'm out. Carl: No, no no, Homer, you have the Royal, um.
  ..Sampler. [three six ten jack king] Home...
• Number One: Homer Simpson, for your continuing and baffling desecration of our beloved sacred parchment, you are hereby banished from the stonecutters forever.
  And as a final humiliation, you must walk home naked, dragging behind you the Stone of Shame....
• Homer: Did you hear me? I said I quit, Monty! And since I quit, I can do anything I want.
  Burns: Is that so? Homer: Ooh, lovely desk. It would be too bad if someone, oh, I don't know....
• Homer: Loyal Stonecutters, let us begin our reenactment of the Battle of Gettysburg.
  [camera pulls back to reveal scattered, costumed monkeys] Marge...
• Hank: The key to motivation is trust. Let me show you what I mean.
  I want you to close your eyes and fall backwards, and I'll catch you....
• Lenny: Hey, Moe...you got change for a five? Moe
  Yeah, sure thing Lenny. [opens cash register] [a cobra pops out and bites him repeatedly] A snake in the cash register!...