- Grandpa: "Grover Cleveland spanked me on two non-consecutive occassions.
Cleveland was the only President of the US to serve two non-consecutive terms.... - Mayor: "Ich bin ein Springfielder." Homer: "Mmmmm. Jelly Donuts.
Explanatio... - When Sideshow Bob is in court, accused of trying to kill Bart, the lawyer says to him on the stand, But what about that tattoo on your chest?
Doesn't it say, "Die Bart, Die?"
Sideshow Bob responds by... - Abe: "My car gets fourty rods to the hogshead and that's the way I like it"
A rod is an arcane form of measurement, equal to 512 yards or 1612 fee
a perch or pole. A rod is also farming measureme... - Fidel Castro: They named a street after me in San Fransisco.
.. [whisper whisper] It's full of WHAT!?!?
Episode: The one trillion dollar bill... - Jasper Johns stealing lightbulbs
Some of Johns best early works were of lightbulbs.
Episode: Homer as an Arti... - Milhouse, on falling in love: "It was just like Romeo and Juliet, only it ended in tragedy.
Episode: When Milhouse has a girlfriend and Bart is jealou... - Milhouse says of Springfield, after Homer floods it, "It's just like Venice, but without the Black Plague.
Episode: Homer as Arti... - Apu: I have come to make amends, sir. At first, I blamed you for squealing, but then I realized, it was I who wronged you.
So I have come to work off my debt. I am at your service.
Homer: You're...sel...
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