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• A real person has two reasons for doing anything ... a good reason and the real reason.
• When a man has not a good reason for doing a thing, he has one good reason for letting it alone.
  -- Sir Walter Sco...
• Most people have two reasons for doing anything -- a good reason, and the real reason.
• I have a few good reasons for drinking And one has just entered my head If a man can't drink when he's living How the hell can he drink when he's dead?
• Real Programmer n. [indirectly, from the book "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche"] A particular sub-variety of hacke
  one possessed of a flippant attitude toward complexity that is arrogant even when justified by experience....
• It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
  In one of those "true facts" books there was an explanation for this law....
• How many lesbians -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Two. One to screw it in real good and one to call the gynaecologist....