Related:

• Quimby: People, take it easy. We're all upset about Mr.
  Burns' plan to, uh, block out our sun. It is time for decisive action....
• If I can catch him once upon the hip I will feed fat the ancient grudge I bear him.
  He hates our sacred nation, and he rails, Even there where merchants most do congregate....
• It is not a man's duty, as a matter of course, to devote himself to the eradication of any, even the most enormous wrong
  he may still properly have other concerns to engage him...
• Remember happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have
  it depends on what you think. -- Dale Carnegie...
• Rachel: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?
  ! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker? Phoebe: No-no-no oh, keep your name, don_t take his name....
• When alerted to an intrusion by tinkling glass or otherwise, 1) Calm yourself 2) Identify the intruder 3) If hostile, kill him.
  Step number 3 is of particular importance. If you leave the guy alive out of misguided softheartedness, he will repay your generosity of spirit by suing you for causing his subsequent paraplegia and seek to force you to support him for the rest of his rotten life....
• Step aside! Sensitive love letters are my specialty!
  -- Homer offers to help Bart write a love letter, "Bart the Love...
• Aunt Patty: "Nothing dear, I'm just trashing your father.
  Lisa: "Well, I wish you wouldn't because, aside from the fact that he has the same frailties as all human beings, he's the only father I have therefore he is my model of manhood and my estimation of him will govern my prospects of my adult relationships....
• Lisa: What, Aunt Patty? Patty: Oh, nothing, dear. I'm just trashing your father.
  Lisa: Well, I wish you wouldn't because, aside from the fact that he has the same frailties as all human beings, he's the only father I have....