Related:

• Lawyer: Robert, if released, would you pose any threat to one Bart Simpson?
  Bob: [barely in control] Bart Simpson? Ha! The spirited little scamp who twice foiled my evil schemes and [maliciously] sent me to this dank, urine-soaked hellhole?...
• Dreams are free, but you get soaked on the connect time.
• The gynecologist says, "My feet are in the stirrups, my knees are in my face, and the door is open facing me .
  .. Can we talk here? Men don't understand ... For a woman to lie in those stirrups, is that the worst?...
• What have I done? My brains are going into my feet!
• Soon to have my feet in the sand, and gators at my heels!
• My woman she done left me My children left me too My mule done kicked my kidneys And my income tax is due.
  -- Dave Barry, "Music To Get Rich By...
• But say my verses do not scan, And I get me another man!
• Inflation: when those who save for a rainy day get soaked.
• Dear Miss Manners: I carry a big black umbrella, even if there's just a thirty percent chance of rain.
  May I ask a young lady who is a stranger to me to share its protection?...