Related:

• The Guy on the Right Doesn't Stand a Chance The guy on the right has the Osborne 1, a fully functional computer system in a portable package the size of a briefcase.
  The guy on the left has an Uzi submachine gun concealed in his attache case....
• When the lights are out, no one can see you hip-check Quaker Oates.
• Chisholm's Third Law Proposals, as understood by the proposer, will be judged otherwise by others.
  Corollary 1: If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will....
• Our [softball] team usually puts the other woman at second base, where the maximum possible number of males can get there on short notice to help out in case of emergency.
  As far as I can tell, our second basewoman is a pretty good baseball player, better than I am, anyway, but there's no way to know for sure because if the ball gets anywhere near her, a male comes barging over from, say, right field, to deal with it....
• Our [softball] team usually puts the other woman at second base, where the maximum possible number of males can get there on short notice to help out in case of emergency.
  As far as I can tell, our second basewoman is a pretty good baseball player, better than I am, anyway, but there's no way to know for sure because if the ball gets anywhere near her, a male comes barging over from, say, right field, to deal with it....
• An Animated Cartoon Theology: 1. People are animals.
  2. The body is mortal and subject to incredible pain....
• programming n. 1. The art of debugging a blank sheet of paper (or, in these days of on-line editing, the art of debugging an empty file).
  Bloody instructions which, being taught, return to plague their inventor" ("Macbeth", Act 1, Scene 7) 2....
• I put the shotgun in an Adidas bag and padded it out with four pairs of tennis socks, not my style at all, but that was what I was aiming fo
  If they think you're crude, go technical; if they think you're technical, go crude....
• I put the shotgun in an Adidas bag and padded it out with four pairs of tennis socks, not my style at all, but that was what I was aiming fo
  If they think you're crude, go technical; if they think you're technical, go crude....