Related:

• Fiddle: Friction of a horse's tail on a cat's entrails.
• Perhaps it was because Nero played the fiddle, that they burned Rome.
• ACCOUNTABILITY, n. The mother of caution. "My accountability, bear in mind," Said the Grand Vizie
  Yes, yes," Said the Shah: "I do -- 'tis the only kind Of ability you possess....
• PEACE, n. In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
  O, what's the loud uproar assailing Mine ears without cease?...
• Heaven, n.: A place where the wicked cease from troubling you with talk of their personal affairs, and the good listen with attention while you expound your own.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.
  "Eat arsenic? Yes, all you get," Consenting, he did speak up...
• I would ask that you stop fiddling with my ears. -- Data