Related:

• AUCTIONEER, n. The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• RANK, n. Relative elevation in the scale of human worth.
  He held at court a rank so high That other noblemen asked why....
• After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven.
  As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created....
• After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven.
  As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created....
• REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he knew.
  The revealing is done by the commentators, who know nothing....
• A man who knows the world will not only make the most of everything he does know, but of many things that he does not know
  and will gain more credit by his adroit mode of hiding his ignorance than the pendant by his awkward attempt to exhibit his erudition....
• END, n. The position farthest removed on either hand from the Interlocutor.
  The man was perishing apace Who played the tambourine...
• BIRTH, n. The first and direst of all disasters. As to the nature of it there appears to be no uniformity.
  Castor and Pollux were born from the egg. Pallas came out of a skull....