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• Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?
  -- Stephen Wrigh...
• Some people think George is weird, because he has sideburns behind his ears.
  I think George is weird, because he has false teeth....
• When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, "Do you have any toy train schedules?
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me.
  I said, "Well, what do you need?" -- Steven Wrigh...
• When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me.
  I said, `Well, what do you need?'" -- Steven Wrigh...
• I have a friend who's a billionaire. He invented Cliff notes.
  When I asked him how he got such a great idea, he said, 'Well first I....
• If you write the word "monkey" a million times, do you start to think you're Shakespeare?
  -- Steven Wrigh...