Related:

• You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.
  Oops sorry, wrong fortune....
• Bender: I need a calculator. Fry: You are a calculator. Bender: I need a good calculator.
• So, um... who's good at keeping secrets? -- Otto, about to design a cover-up, "Homerpalooza
• A lot of people will urge you to put some money in a bank, and in fact--within reason--this is very good advice.
  But don't go overboard. Remember, what you are doing is giving your money to someone else to hold on to, and I think that it is worth keeping in mind that the businessmen who run banks are so worried about holding on to things that they put little chains on all their pens....
• Bender: I don't know why, but when I look down at their little faces it makes me want to puke.
  .. in a good way....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Sorry, my English is not very good. No punt intended.
• Good news, everyone." -Professor "Uh oh. I don't like the sound of that.
  Bender "You'll be making a delivery to the planet Trisaw....
• One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything every night before you go to bed.
  -- Ann Lande...