Related:

• May a diseased elephant sit on your face.
• Purrloiner: A cat in your lap.
• My cat can lick your cat!
• Smithers: People like dogs, Mr. Burns. Burns: Nonsense.
  Dogs are idiots! Think about it, Smithers. If I came into your house and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over your face, what would you say?...
• You're obviously on your last lap around the gene pool.
• If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you
  but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. -- Alfred North Whitehead...
• Bow your head with great respect, and Genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
• Never bow to authority, but always tip your hat. -- Jim Fiebig
• I would like to lick apricot brandy out of your navel. -- Cerebu