Related:

• Two peanuts went to New York. One was assaulted.
• I'd hate to be a new baby being born into this world today.
  There seems to be so much trouble everywhere. If I were a new baby, I don't think I could stand knowing what I was going to have to go through....
• In Greene, New York, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks when a concert is on.
• If you are one in a million, there are 8 of you in New York City.
• New York: where everyone mutinies but no one deserts. -- Harry Hershfield
• One of the rules of Busmanship, New York style, is never surrender your seat to another passenger.
  This may seem callous, but it is the best way, really....