One Day This Guy Is Finally Fed Up With His Middle-class Existence And Decides To Do Something About It.

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One day this guy is finally fed up with his middle-class existence and
decides to do something about it. He calls up his best friend, who is a
mathematical genius. "Look," he says, "do you suppose you could find some
way mathematically of guaranteeing winning at the race track? We could
make a lot of money and retire and enjoy life." The mathematician thinks
this over a bit and walks away mumbling to himself.
A week later his friend drops by to ask the genius if he's had any
success. The genius, looking a little bleary-eyed, replies, "Well, yes,
actually I do have an idea, and I'm reasonably sure that it will work, but
there a number of details to be figured out.
After the second week the mathematician appears at his friend's house,
looking quite a bit rumpled, and announces, "I think I've got it! I still have
some of the theory to work out, but now I'm certain that I'm on the right
At the end of the third week the mathematician wakes his friend by
pounding on his door at three in the morning. He has dark circles under his
eyes. His hair hasn't been combed for many days. He appears to be wearing
the same clothes as the last time. He has several pencils sticking out from
behind his ears and an almost maniacal expression on his face. "WE CAN DO
IT! WE CAN DO IT!!" he shrieks. "I have discovered the perfect solution!!
And it's so EASY! First, we assume that horses are perfect spheres in simple
harmonic motion..."