Related:

• Once upon a time...is now.
• Once upon a time there...
• Once upon a girl there was a time...
• Once upon a time, I had a good girl. Once upon a girl, I had a good time...
• Once upon a time, four AMPHIBIOUS HOG CALLERS attacked a family of DEFENSELESS, SENSITIVE COIN COLLECTORS and brought DOWN their PROPERTY VALUES!
  ! -- Zippy the Pinhead...
• The dust we tread upon was once alive.
• Mommy, do all fairy tales beginning with `Once upon a time'?
  "No, dear. Nowadays, lots of them start with `If I am elected....
• Once upon a time, I dreamed of becoming a great man.
  Later, a good man. Now, finally, I find it difficult enough and honor enough to be--a man....
• Once upon a time, people lived happily ever after. Now people live happily ever after, too
  after the kids are out of the house and through college...