Related:

• Fortune presents: USEFUL PHRASES IN ESPERANTO, #1.
  ^Cu vi parolas angle? Do you speak English? Mi ne komprenas....
• Fortune presents: USEFUL PHRASES IN ESPERANTO, #5.
  Mi ^cevalovipus vin se mi havus I'd horsewhip you if I had a horse....
• alk mode n. A feature supported by Unix, ITS, and some other OSes that allows two or more logged-in users to set up a real-time on-line conversation.
  It combines the immediacy of talking with all the precision (and verbosity) that written language entails....
• TV: So call me now! $5 for the first minute, $2 for each additional minute!
  Homer: [dials the number] Voice: You... have reached....
• FORTUNE'S GUIDE TO DEALING WITH REAL-LIFE SCIENCE FICTION
  #2 What to do... if you get a phone call from Ma...
• Abe: {Come on, lucky seven! Poppa needs a new pair of spats.
  I want some of that sweet, sweet Do Re Mi. Fat city, here I come!...
• Steve has been captured by a flying saucer and can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave your name, phone number, and a message, I'll have him call you back as soon as he gets away.
  Read all about it in next week's National Enquirer....
• HOW TO LEAVE THE PLANET 1. Phone NASA. Their phone number is (731) 483-3111.
  Explain that it's very important that you get away as soon as possible....
• Homer: Shary Bobbins, I want another beer. Shary: Well, you know, Homer [musical intro, Shary starts singing] If there's a job that must be done, You'll find it's much more fun.
  .. Homer: [interrupting] You'll find it's even _more_ fun if _you_ get it for _me_!...