Related:

• A guy is walking over a bridge, and his wallet falls into the river.
  He looks over and sees that the fish are tossing his wallet to each other....
• Vegetarians who constantly carp at carnivores will die before the age of 50.
• Yeah, out like a lighthouse, hard as a carp, cold as a mackeral.
• BTW, does Jesus know you flame? -- Diane Holt, dianeh@binky.UUCP, to Ed Carp
• BROTHER MAYNARD: Armaments Chapter Two Verses Nine to Twenty One.
  ANOTHER MONK: And St. Attila raised his hand grenade up on high saying O Lord bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy....
• Homer: Don't worry about a thing, honey. I'm going to help you through this.
  [he and Marge sit down; some noises occur] Those are all normal noises....
• Let me guess, Ed. Pentecostal, right? -- Starcap'n Ra, ra@asuvax.
  asu.edu Nope. Charismatic (I think - I've given up on what all those pesky labels mean)....
• A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the Game Warden.
  Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like the proverbial bat out of hell, and hot on his heels ran the Game Warden....
• One day President Reagan, Chairman Andropov, the Pope, and a boy scout were flying together in an airplane.
  Right out in the middle of nowhere the plane developed engine trouble and started to go down....