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• The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and attached together in the form of furniture, finished, and put inside boxes.
  -- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw...
• Home centers are designed for the do-it-yourselfer who's willing to pay higher prices for the convenience of being able to shop for lumber, hardware, and toasters all in one location.
  Notice I say shop for, as opposed to obtain. This is the major drawback of home cente...
• Home centers are designed for the do-it-yourselfer who's willing to pay higher prices for the convenience of being able to shop for lumber, hardware, and toasters all in one location.
  Notice I say "shop for", as opposed to "obtain"....
• Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool sets for under $
  4?" An excellent question. Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they have a food section specializing in cardboard cartons full of Raisinets and malted milk balls manufactured during the Nixon administration....
• My family tree was chopped down and they made the lumber into toilet paper.
  We've never been closer. -- Barry Steige...
• Guide: Many interesting and important things have been put into boxes over the yea
  extiles, other boxes, even children's candy. Milhouse...