Related:

• You know it is going to be a rotten day when... You wake up to the soothing sound of flowing water.
  .. the day after you bought a waterbed....
• You know you're in trouble when... 1) You wake up face down on the pavement.
  2) Your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache....
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when you wake up and your braces have locked together.
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when you wake up to the sound of DEA agents/FBI agents/Armenian Nationalists breaking down your door.
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when You call your answering service and they've never heard of you.
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when Your pet rock snaps at you.
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when you put your bra on backwards, and it fits better.
• You know it's going to be a rotten day when... you wake up face down on the pavement.
• You know you're in trouble when... (1) You've been at work for an hour before you notice that your skirt is caught in your pantyhose.
  (2) Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife. (3) Your income tax check bounces....