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• Homer: Oh, I need money. Apu: Well, if you need money, you should have at least jammed a gun in my ribs, or better yet, you could inquire about my help-wanted sign.
  Homer: You're looking for help? Apu: Yes, we need someone for the demanding yet high-profile midnight to 8am shift....
• How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away? -- Fortune's Fictitious Country Song Title of the Week
• Fortune's Fictitious Country Song Title of the Week
  "How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away?...
• Though I'd been taught at our dining room table about the solar system and knew the earth revolved around the su
  and our moon around us, I never found out the moon didn't come up in the west until I was a writer and Herschel Brickell, the literary critic, told me after I misplaced it in a story....
• Homer: You know, son, the day you were born, I received the greatest gift a man could have.
  As the years went by, your mother and I were blessed twice more....
• THIS IS PLEDGE WEEK FOR THE FORTUNE PROGRAM If you like the fortune program, why not support it now with your contribution of a pithy fortune, clean or obscene?
  We cannot continue without your support. Less than 14% of all fortune users are contributors....
• Oh, Picard, I will enjoy you morning, noon and night.
• THIS IS PLEDGE WEEK FOR THE FORTUNE PROGRAM If you like the fortune program, why not support it now with your contribution of a pithy fortune, clean or obscene?
  We cannot continue without your support. Less than 14% of all fortune users are contributors....