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• If you jot down every silly thought that pops into your mind, you will soon find out everything you most seriously believe.
  -- Mignon McLaughli...
• The judge asked, "What do you plead?" I said, "Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• Nurse: Abraham Simpson, your family is here to visit you.
  Abe: Hot diggity, my family's come to visit me!...
• If you would want to know what you would be like if you lost your mind, put a tape recorder nearby and have it running when you take your second or third drink.
• Something better... 1 (obvious): Excuse me. Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face?
  2 (meteorological): Everybody take cover. She's going to blow....
• Apu: This is the room with electricity. But it has too much electricity.
  So, I don't know, you might want to wear a hat. Ned...
• How much flour can you grind in the Windmill of your mind?
• A vivid and creative mind characterizes you. Too bad you can't keep your mind on the down to earth things.
• Bet you wonder how I knew about your plan to make me blue with some other guy that you knew before.
  Between both guys you know I love you more. It took me by surprise, I must say, when I found out yesterday....