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• A distraught patient phoned her doctor's office. "Was it true," the woman inquired, "that the medication the doctor had prescribed was for the rest of her life?
  She was told that it was. There was just a moment of silence before the woman proceeded bravely on....
• Standing there making a sitting target of himself.
• The person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused. -- Shirley Maclaine
• They don't even send him rejection slips anymore. All his stories come back marked "Opened by Mistake.
  -- George Price...
• Liberal fairness: making the rich poor instead of the poor rich!
• NOVEMBER Oh come on, that was months ago, it's pointless dwelling on it now.
  The word November is actually Latin. Nov means nine, indicating the ninth month, which is due to the guy who made up all the months having a bit of a problem with adding up....
• hacker humor A distinctive style of shared intellectual humor found among hackers, having the following marked characteristic
  1. Fascination with form-vs.-content jokes, paradoxes, and humor having to do with confusion of metalevels (see meta)....
• INSTRUCTIONS 1. Take your new Toxic Custard out of the box, and check that all the parts are present.
  (Main heading, body, dividing hyphens, back-issues plug, signature) 2....