Related:

• Are you Catholic?" "Episcopalian, and not very." "Ja, ja. Agnoztic." -- From "The Badge
• If you eat Twinkies Lite, do you kill one third less people?
  No, but you get a much lighter sentence...
• I'm a Catholic. I'm like most Catholics. When I grew up I quit.
  I can't quite understand some religions. They're all supposed to be right....
• A Catholic took his Protestant friend to Mass and the Priest talked and talked and talked.
  In one of the few moments of silence, the Protestant visitor turned to his Catholic host and asked in a rather loud stage whisper which everyone heard, " What follows when the Priest quits?...
• Q: What's a light-year? A: One-third less calories than a regular year.
• In the hotel there was a mirror over my bed! I was uneasy going to sleep.
  When I sleep I toss and turn, and when I woke up I thought I saw a naked sky diver coming at me ....
• I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck.
  Marriage is a two-way proposition, but never let the woman know she is one of the ways....