Related:

• Shit Happens' according to... Lawyer: For a sufficient fee, I can get you out of ANY shit.
• When a lawyer tells his clients he has a sliding fee schedule what he means is that after he bills you it's financially hard to get back on your feet.
• What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer? Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
• Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? A: An offer you can't understand.
• Win Some Lose Some....But When Do I Win Some?
• Ben, as your attorney, your friend, and your brother, I strongly suggest you get a better lawyer.
  -- Jerry Horne, _Twin Peaks_...
• IRS HUMOR EXAMPLE A: A lawyer, a doctor and a priest were marooned on a desert island.
  So we confiscated their homes. IRS HUMOR EXAMPLE B...
• I'd resign from the human race, but I can't get my membership fee back.
• Marge: No, I will _not_ pay you $500 for sex! Home
  Aw, come on, Marge! You're getting something in return, and I'm getting a bowling team....