Related:

• Silence when you're shouting at me! -- Woody Allen, What's New, Pussycat?
• As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
  -- Woody Alle...
• One thing about intellectuals, they proved that they can be absolutely brilliant and have no idea what's going on.
  -- Woody Allen, "Annie Hall...
• Meet me in the bedroom in five minutes... and bring a cattle prod!
  -- Woody Allen's What's Up Tiger Lily...
• When I was born, my family was so poor my mother couldn't afford to use talcum powder on me.
  So she used to douse me with kitchen baking soda ....
• It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune. -- Woody Alle